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About Deviant Member HelbrightMale/United States Recent Activity
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I think I'd rather not have days off.  
85% are spent just staring into space,
my muse dead at my side for so long the corpse is already bone.
It's hard to speak or play with a person who pushes you away because he doesn't understand,
and while I love her I've always felt like there was a wall between us.
It feels like every day is a curse when everything is cloudy,
when you annoy the people you care about,
Every moment you think you should just leave these white pills behind,
because in your mind the madness still scratches at the door,
I could drown in it once more, I wasn't happier, but I was more creative,
but that never did anything for me,
dozens of poems and a few short stories later and I can't even get a "U suk fag8t."
It must be bad when your work doesn't even attract scorn, it means it is bland.
I just want to sometimes . . . sometimes in the dead of night . . .
die by the sword, with a bullet in my lungs,
dreams all wrung out,
what's left is no fun, Not yet, not yet,
A spattered head on the ground, a trail of bodies marking my frown,


Not even that, a straw death waits for me, a life of abstract failure and misery,
with the scorn of everyone around me,
A hang man's noose braided by time,
so pathetic I make it like a nursery rhyme,
a scheme, a dream, a dream for every scheme,
a thousand failures and endless screams,
those long nights with the knife and how much euphoria I felt,
when steel bit my flesh and on my tongue did blood melt,
I'd drink my pain and eat my flesh where I could again,
but Well is my Butrin, my mind and life bland.





Just kill me.
And I'll sit in my room,

Pretend it's not the end of days,

But I've lost all my faith,

with no gods to whom I can pray,

because in the end,

it's Mankind's own way,

Marching down to extinction,

at the end of the day,

And here we'll sing,

in the ruins of it all,

Glad at least for the company,

during the final curtain call,

As long as we have each other's little community,

I'm sure we'll find some lasting peace,

wait and see.

And here we'll sit,

spiraling down to the ground,

smiling at each other,

feeling in no way profound,

dark may creep into our eyes in the end,

but death is better when your with a friend.
Songs in the Key of Terra
I've been dreaming odd dreams lately where songs and sad, but also joyous times occur.
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Whether as if like wind through stars I drift alight,
sorrow bereft and hollow ere' 'tis night,
without somber plod or cursed muttered,
without foul and coarse verse I uttered,
where once my hand swung dark and true,
I have been left reborn anew,
With a mind clearer hence of this haze,
life has been rebuilt and with it a new maze,
a twisting corridor endless, heedless,
set within my mind bearing fruit sadly seedless.
Without Demons
After I was put on Anti-Anxiety-Antiy-Depression meds for a good while I could not craft the written word.  Indeed I felt utterly bereft of creativity.  This was the first poem that came to mind soem months after when I once again re-awoke to find the new man before me.
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Now I'm sure I'll annoy people but i need to refine my concepts, if not for real life (because I'm no leader by heart and little more than an ideas man) then maybe I could write a book or essay on the subject.  .

I'm trying to hammer out what religion is truly about, a guide book to humanity and ethics, community, social inclusion, ritual and ceremony for focusing the mind and at one point, one of the last bastions for learning in a brutal world (after it decimated certain point by it).  To me religion is little more than a kind of psychological profile of a culture, hence its mutability in transition between forms.

My reasoning for why it's a guide post to humanity is it often has stories and allegories to the human condition via symbolism and imagery.  From the studies I have done symbolism is intensely powerful to the subconscious mind because it is how it functions over the conscious mind.  Anyway here it goes

Consider a "religion" based on man, its sanctity and responsibilities in the universe and and a rational guide post to both how to learn, how to be human and how we may achieve focus, community and greater forging of the will, spirit and direction of our species.


But then again I envision a Monastic setting where people go to shut out the world for a time, to focus and learn and self improve, like a combination of western and eastern monasticism with all the fluff thrown away so there is only Mankind, the world, the cosmos and our place within.  Now imagine those people now capable of going out and articulating those thoughts unto their fellow man and spreading the glory of who we are as a creature as well as our perceived destiny of exploring the cosmos.  Many people believe our technology is outpacing our humanity.  I aim to fix that and have our humanity outstrip our technology.
Consider a "religion" based on man, its sanctity and responsibilities in the universe and and a rational guide post to both how to learn, how to be human and how we may achieve focus, community and greater forging of the will, spirit and direction of our species.

But then again I envision a Monastic setting where people go to shut out the world for a time, to focus and learn and self improve, like a combination of western and eastern monasticism with all the fluff thrown away so there is only Mankind, the world, the cosmos and our place within.  Now imagine those people now capable of going out and articulating those thoughts unto their fellow man and spreading the glory of who we are as a creature as well as our perceived destiny of exploring the cosmos.  Many people believe our technology is outpacing our humanity.  I aim to fix that and have our humanity outstrip our technology.
Consider a "religion" based on man, its sanctity and responsibilities in the universe and and a rational guide post to both how to learn, how to be human and how we may achieve focus, community and greater forging of the will, spirit and direction of our species.

But then again I envision a Monastic setting where people go to shut out the world for a time, to focus and learn and self improve, like a combination of western and eastern monasticism with all the fluff thrown away so there is only Mankind, the world, the cosmos and our place within.  Now imagine those people now capable of going out and articulating those thoughts unto their fellow man and spreading the glory of who we are as a creature as well as our perceived destiny of exploring the cosmos.  Many people believe our technology is outpacing our humanity.  I aim to fix that and have our humanity outstrip our technology.

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effigytormented
Helbright
United States
Well I love metal, the smell of it I mean, and gunpowder. I'm a self styled pirate of the modern age and am something of a very bad writer. When not spending time reading or writing, I am practicing with my cutlass and/or longsword (I'm also a M.A.R.E fanatic).



Current Residence: Hometown
Favorite genre of music: Folk Metal
Favorite style of art: Gritty fantasy
Operating System: Custom
MP3 player of choice: Sony Walkman
Shell of choice: Koopa troopa (lol, still gets me)
Wallpaper of choice: Randoms
Skin of choice: Mine, I've grown attached to it
Favorite cartoon character: My own personal ones I make in my head.
Personal Quote: Live by the motto, die by the irony.
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:iconskulkey:
skulkey Featured By Owner Sep 20, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
thanks for the watch! :)
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:iconeffigytormented:
effigytormented Featured By Owner Sep 20, 2014
S'aight
Reply
:iconspiritwarriors:
SpiritWarriors Featured By Owner Apr 8, 2014
Thanks for the :+devwatch: =D
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:iconeffigytormented:
effigytormented Featured By Owner Apr 8, 2014
S'aight big guy, I like to eyeball people.
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:iconyasha-k:
Yasha-K Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Oh hay thankies for the watch! 
You rock! Llama for you!
:iconblushyplz:
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:iconeffigytormented:
effigytormented Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014
Well thank ye kindly.
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:iconalberti:
alberti Featured By Owner Mar 25, 2014
thanks for watch)
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:iconeffigytormented:
effigytormented Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2014
You're welcome, thanks for the epic cosplay!
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:iconthe-sham-is-i:
the-sham-is-I Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
thank you for checking out my group :)
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:iconeffigytormented:
effigytormented Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2014
thanks for adding me, I've gotten quite sick of roleplay on other sites and I'm looking for a place that I can actually expand my writings abilities again.
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